Once upon a time, LA-based lifestyle blog, Philip & Isabella, featured a little piece I wrote, catered to the fellas, on How To Write a Love Letter. Now, this how-to format hopefully inspired some of the man-folk to pick up a pen and write down their most sincere feelings. Right? He loves me... he loves me not?!
Hallmark is for amateurs. Real men write love letters.
As the month of LOVE comes to a close, otherwise known as the holiday of mail, (according to my darling cousin, Isabella) it’s amazing to me the number of women I’ve recently encountered who have NEVER actually received a legitimate love letter.
Remember grade school days when we made decorative Valentines boxes and gave candy-grams and carnations to the cute boys in class? When it was reassuring to get tons of cards from all the hotties with sayings like BE MINE or I’VE GOT MY EYE ON YOU. What happened to that innocent declaration of love that seemed so easy as a kid? It may not have meant as much back then but its depressingly sad that many of my gorgeous female friends, both single and married, haven’t seen a written expression of love EVER SINCE!
Of course in today’s digital dating world we’re programmed to reread text message exchanges and Facebook chats from our crushes, pining to analyze what each phrase or sentence means. Searching for hidden messages of love within the, “hey girl, where you at?” and “we on tonight?” texts like its an AP course in Shakespearean Literature. Guys have become so lazy and ill equipped (no pun intended) in declaring their love, often forgetting to even hit up the card aisle at the nearest grocery store, that the ladies they’ve magically wooed are disappointed yet equally to blame for these shortcomings. We want and deserve more!
Whether you are married, engaged, dating, or even flirting with a flame, keep the spark alive with this simple tutorial on How to Write a Love Letter - 10 easy steps that guarantee you’ll win her over with the loveliest trick in the book.
HOW TO WRITE A LOVE LETTER
Step 1. Pick the Paper
You definitely do not need to overthink this. A clean sheet of lined-paper would do just fine. But if you want to dazzle us with your Casanova-like qualities, get creative and make us a pinterest-friendly announcement or find a sheet of stationery that suits your lady’s style. It truly is the thought that counts, but we notice when you make that extra-effort (as will we… later on.)
Step 2. Choose a Writing Instrument.
For sure, you can go with a standard number #2 pencil or any kind of pen, but bring out your inner-Hemingway and bust out the vintage typewriter. While they are quite extinct, I know a few fellas out there who actually still own old electric typewriters from their school days. And if you aren’t so lucky, check out your neighborhood thrift store, or borrow one from a instagrammer/stylista who just happens to have one because they are so cute to look at. You just never know…and this romantic gesture will definitely knock the socks (and pants) off your lady-love.
Step 3. Brainstorm Your Content
I know this is hard. Guys are not always able to express their feelings in words but by doing a little pre-planning, it can certainly help get your thoughts and structure on paper. Perhaps you want to take a poetic approach with lines that rhyme or maybe this is just a simple statement of attraction, regardless of the content’s nature, make a list of 10 ideas, phrases, or sentences that you want to include. Get personal. Be clever. Show her that you HAVE been listening this whole time.
Step 4. Outline the Letter
After you’ve made your list, formulate your letter in an outline. I know you did this in school, remember 5th grade English? What order makes the most sense to you and sounds best. Consider building intensity with your declarations, like you do in the bedroom. For example, start out by describing how you felt when you first met and continue to explain how your feelings (and man parts) have grown with each coming day. We aren’t afraid of a few dirty thoughts – we like it when you talk that way.
Step 5. Write With LOVE
Get the first draft out. Write from your heart. Tell her how you feel. What the first moment with her was like. Why you’ve never expressed yourself like this before. Here’s your shot to make her fall in love with you ALL OVER AGAIN. And she will, I’m certain, as long as you are sincere, honest and mean what you say.
Step 6. Proof & Revise
I know this isn’t a homework assignment but definitely reread and check for any grammar mistakes or spelling errors. We want to be impressed with your first love letter, and chances are we’re going to share this with our girlfriends and brag about how smart and talented you are. By giving that extra attention to detail, you’ll look like the genius we’ve always hoped you be.
Step 7. Seal with a Kiss
Okay, you don’t have to ACTUALLY kiss the letter. But fold it neatly and place into a proper envelope. If at all possible, you could put one of those nifty red wax seals over the enclosure. That’s so overly official that you wouldn’t even need to kiss it for good luck…but you can if you wish!
Step 8. Scents for our Sensitivity
Yes, please, by all means, go for it. Spritz a bit of your manly cologne on the envelope. Arouse us with your masculine scent before we even read your confession of love. It’s possible that this teaser will work before we even open up.
Step 9. The Letter Set-Up
Make sure to surprise us with this golden letter of love. In fact, we’d prefer to find it waiting for us to read alone. We’ll be soaking in EVERY. SINGLE. WORD. you write, rereading your poetry over and over again. Perhaps you should leave it on our doorstep or on top of our pillow (if you have keys to our castle). You can always send flowers to our office and include the letter. Not only will this save you the face-to-face confrontation, but will add a bit of mystery to our long-awaited response.
Step 10. Be the KING
You’ve earned the title, Sir Love-A-Lot. We will be so in awe of your magical powers in the written word that we will grant you any wish… ANY WISH AT ALL.